Monday, August 30, 2010

She climbed the Golden Stairs

She passed away yesterday midnight on the way to the hospital. It was really shocking to know that one of my juniors did suicide and ended her life.

I am yet to recover from it!

About Divya: She was born to a high profile family - her dad ( ex-minister / ex-MP) and her mom (senior official in a bank). She is now married and is having a 8 months old son.

Back during college days, she was one of the most noticed juniors from the time she joined her class due to her dad's position. She did score well in her B Tech course and became the class topper.

More than a class topper she was the one who always handled things calm and cool despite her circumstances.

She was really an ambitious girl, who had her future planned and clear in front of her. She knew what she needed to do and she worked hard for it as well.

She spoke less, but she made sure that everyone listened to her point whenever she had it.

She topped in her M. Tech course as well. Today, when I spoke to one of her teachers , he very clearly remembers her - she was different. Not only did she outdo her academics but also she was involved in other activities for free software movement - she was really active n smart.

I always admired her hard work and persistence in studies.

I still wonder what might have made her undergo such a situation. Whatever might be the reason, may be there was a solution to it than what she had done to herself?

It is really unbelievable how things turn out in life.

I always had the impression that the studious are the ones who are going to lead a successful life. -May be I am not right?

May be in life, studies or position is not what matters

May be in life we are all in search
In search of something
And we get busy and frustrated on the way

And what we have along us are the friends and relatives
Let us treasure the close circle of lives
The lives that protects us, surrounds us
Those are the lives that makes us cherish
Those are the ones who will share the shoulder
And those are the ones who will be with us
No matter where we are
And that is what makes our life worth living!
Let us thank each one of them for adding a moment to our life

Let all of us get what we wish for
And let us all live till we realize what we are for
And finish the karma of life!

I am sure; Divya did touch many lives!
And I see the sorrow in all those faces
In whichever corner of the world they are in
They will all remember her
They will all see her face and pray for a moment before they go to bed

Let us hold the light and wish her peace wherever she is now!
May her soul rest in peace!

PS: I never thought I would ever write such a post. I wish, I never write similar one again!
Thanks Manju for sharing Divya's photo.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

This will also pass by

'This will also pass by’ this is what I am keep saying now a days…. - This is how Prasad concluded his email. For few days I was in hospital and when I just came out, my dad got into the hospital.

Appears to me that I am going through the ‘hospital climate’ as I call it :-)

The assumption that goes with this specific climate is it can come only once in a year; if not once in life time (I know, I know that is really ambitious to say hospital climate once in life time! )

Jokes apart, the truth is I got admitted to a hospital, first time ever in my life. As everyone says, there has to be a first time for everything; it tends to be the same for me as well.

After my operation, I keep getting this dizziness. It is like when I try to get up or when I am just standing straight, I can see the world around, toppling up / down /bottoms up .. haha it is really funny from one end and the other end me trying to close my eyes and hold whatever is next to me just to ensure that I am not toppling down!

Honestly, I am so touched by what he said ‘This will also pass by’ It kind of murmurs in my ears still..

PS: Thanks Prasad (Prasad Babu) .. What you said is so true. No matter what happens, everything will pass by us, and later we too might follow it.

Sunday, August 08, 2010

Wake me up

I went to sleep
A long sleep in anesthesia

I asked her name, I remember
‘Sreeja’, she said smiling at me
She was beautiful,

She had round face,

A typical south Indian figure she had,
She came near to me and held my right hands
She smiled and said ‘everything is going to be fine’,
Neither did I notice the syringe in her other hand
Nor did I notice the anesthesia
While I enjoyed her beautiful face,
Lyiing down in the stretcher,
She whispered to me, ‘You are going to have a very light pain’
I closed my eyes, waiting for the pain
I felt the pinch and then coolness
A cool numbness which spread through my right hand,
It then crept into my brain and to my whole body
I could barely see the huge round lights
The lights of the operation theater
The lights went on making everything disappear
Disappear in darkness
I went into the dark with light all over me!
Can someone wake me up?

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Happy Aries Girl

There came a response. It appears to me that the earlier post was the first article about Aries girl that has even been written/ published ever in this world.

In fact, I think it was the first post which I dedicated to someone as well- pure coincidence!

We act different at times. We might not know the answers to many questions which pops up in our mind – why he has written about me? , why he has said that? , why did he behave like that?– Hold on, answer is simple -we are just what we are!!

We are so called ‘humans’, with all unique strengths and weakness that we carry to our name as our ‘own’ :-) - no matter who decided 'our' names.

Later, may be years later, we might get the complete picture. -As Steve Jobs said,it is impossible to connect the dots looking forward, but it was very, very clear looking backwards years later.’ - during his Stanford graduation ceremony talk.

We are punching the dots in a virgin white canvas!! – We are just punching, unknowingly without recognizing what we are carving out of it!!

As everyone says, our mind is not reasonable at times. We might not have a response to ‘why’ it behaves different.- Except that we did it because we felt so! - that too at that particular moment in time!

Perhaps, that was what it needs to be done! - It might be just that we are not ‘enabled’ to decode and understand?

We would see everything with utmost clarity sometime later. – Don’t ask me when. That is going to be later is what I can say now.

Who knows how long we are going to live in this so called planet ‘earth’. If we touch any soul who is feeling better about it, may be it can be considered as an achievement, till our last breath.

It is not about so called ‘love’- which truly, I am not able to understand till date.

And to clarify some of my readers, Aries girl is just an acquaintance as of today – so don’t even think about words called ‘love’, whose meaning is yet to be defined as per my own dictionary!

The irony is that, the person who loves / likes you most will start hating/ disliking you in a fraction of second. – Check this link : Married life : A Court view I witnessed in real!

So, it all comes down to the moment; the moment you are happy.

May be years later, the Aries girl might start hating me!
-The same girl who feels happy now for the earlier post!

May be it has nothing to do with her;
-it might just be circumstances that creates a different mindset of her for her?

'There is only one life. Should do whatever you love to.’, says Aries girl. - I honestly feel the Aries girl knows what she needs to know!

And I try to do what I love to do; To write.

To write, what my mind utters to me.

With no alterations!!

‘Your blog was really good. You have good prospects in that field’,
she says.

I responded, humbly,’ Don’t promote me. As i said, I might create a book out of you!!”

Should I make this a serial?

Should I start writing about the persons that I met in actual life?

Would that be interesting at all to any of the readers?

What you say Aries girl?? - Would you be interested ?

Monday, August 02, 2010

Aries Girl

I hardly knew her. She was one among the bunch of acquaintances that I had. I never bothered to know her, neither she bothered to know me.

Now years later, in fact several years later we heard each other’s voice.
You know, it is really nice to hear the voice of someone whom you knew years before. And that too without being in touch for several years and then talking to each other as a surprise!

Though I didn’t know this girl as a person, I somehow had a feeling that the life is rough on her.

The things that happened to her and the tough times that she had to go through to reach where she is, is really like a fiction.

Sometimes, these real stories we won’t believe in. We still feel that the life is bed of roses and everything will come to us for a reason.

May be life is not that tough
May be everything that happened to her in life was meant to happen
May be she is drifting towards the destiny – unknowingly

May be she will find her right man

May be as the astrologer told her – She will be luckier as days goes by

May be she will become the luckiest girl ever!

May be she will travel around the world! – As she dreams
May everything good happen to her
And let her be another happy soul on earth!
I dedicate this post to you,
You Aries Girl!

Sunday, August 01, 2010

Why on earth?

Today in my return trip from Cochin to Trivandrum, I happened to see a very beautiful lady!

However, she was accompanied by her boyfriend :-)

You know what? -Why it is that all the ladies who are beautiful, attractive and nice are TAKEN?

Why in the world is that I am the one who is alone ?
Why is that I never get a nice company?

She was cute
She was nice and soft spoken
Her eyes were captive
Her smile! – Well, i can’t forget it
Her face was so expressive
How can ladies be such beautiful?
God has really been partial to men!
Alas, I am not going to meet her again..
And I miss her!!
Is it her presence that I am missing ?
Is it her sweet voice ?
Is it her in all ?
Perhaps, it was all because she was from the UK ?
And I feel these because I am from India?

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